I just completed the final step of passing a board exam for registration as an Occupational Therapist. Finally, after 4 years of prerequisites, graduate school, and fieldwork rotations, the journey has come to an end. I celebrated the achievement. It felt like a big day, that Thursday morning.
As evening carried on, I felt the day shrinking around me. What was I to do now, I wondered. Measurable amounts of free and open time on my hands, time to write music again and find out more about the birds of the Southwest. The day grew increasing small and by bedtime, I realized it was just me, alone with these thoughts of a more open schedule and infinite possibilities.
I've thought a lot today about how days maybe aren't good or bad, but just feel big or small. I've wondered how I can give myself more room to move when the days start shrinking in around me, the days when I feel I haven't done enough or that I don't have enough time. How I can possibly have more big days compared to small in the end. I've thought about how some songs sound as though they can carry the ocean in them, how I've sensed that expansiveness when I've ventured into creating some songs of my own. I've wondered if I will ever feel that way again.
No comments:
Post a Comment