Saturday, November 13, 2010

Unpacking

I wrote a song a year ago. When I was browsing through my laptop files, I came across a demo I recorded dated "A Thousand Keys demo 11-13-09".

Has it really been a year? I thought to myself.

I am not by nature a persistent being. Overall, I'd describe myself as a generalist in life. Broad, sweeping knowledge of a variety of adult pursuits - occupational therapy, running, birding, tennis, and yes, music and songwriting. Even this blog is representative of piqued and then waning interest, as it is my third attempt in this short year. I invest just enough time to get a glimpse of what it might mean to be good at something and then - a wash of boredom or fear or shifting priorities.

Some of the things I have mastered include at staying up late, overscheduling my days, and smoking, but these traits aren't very functional.

I could watch another day fade before me, as many weekend days do. But last night, I sat on an ottoman, calendar open, and decided to bring over recording equipment to my housesitting assignment, and celebrate A Thousand Keys 1st birthday by perhaps pushing her along, asking her to grow up or to figure out if I have grown 365 days older.



I packed my recording tools this late morning and started to think that I really should document this day. I have read inspirational books on the creative process and the documentations of the experience by better artists and writers. I have watched enough viral TED videos on the meaning of happiness and mastery of craft.

But as I packed my equipment, I thought to myself "You know what? I really do hate this." That's something no one ever really says out loud, it seems. I hate lugging gear. I hate the feeling of inadequacy and being a novice. I hate when parts don't fit into a recording, and when ideas fail. Yes, I hate it and I think I should.

But I do it anyway. Sporadically and awkwardly.

So I'll unpack the gear now, in this co-worker's home. It has nice acoustics and lots of sunlight. And I'm sure I'm going to hate it. But A Thousand Keys is a year older. And so am I.

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